You have all heard the proverbial drawing a line the sand. Well where is that line? Where should it be drawn? Does it depend on circumstance? On relationship? On Individual?
So many times people give ultimatums, they say THIS is my limit. I am drawing my line RIGHT HERE! Then shortly after their significant other, family member, society, whoever crosses that line and a new line is drawn. Is it wrong to defend your line? Is it ok for the other person to question your line?
It boils down to this...You have standards. Standards for yourself, your children, even your spouse. You have standards that are important to you, otherwise anything would be acceptable. It IS ok to fight for those. It IS ok to say this is not right, this is not what I want. The other person must then accept the spot where the line was drawn or retreat. Don't be afraid of them retreating. If the things that are important to you and held in high regard BY you are not even considered by the other person then they are not what is needed in your life. THEY are now not acceptable. It doesn't mean it's easy. It doesn't mean that a switch flips and suddenly you don't care about them and want them around. But sometimes you have to put YOU first. You have to say...I deserve better than this. I deserve to have my feelings taken into account. I deserve to have someone care about how I feel for once. You deserve to feel good about yourself and your line. So, draw in confidence...
Disclaimer: Overdrawing however, drives people nuts, so make sure it's something worth fighting for. Don't draw lines, just to draw lines.
Love,
Layla
2 comments:
and... in life... there really aren't erasers for those lines. you just end up smudging them. and that's messy.
i agree. we DO have to stand up for what we believe, expect, and DESERVE!
Hey, thanks for adding me to your blogroll! Cool! I've got some more to add to my list, so you'll go on there too.
I totally agree about boundaries. Pick what's most important, and then stick with it. But not everything has to be an issue, either. Know yourself, what you believe, then stand your ground. If you do it with understanding and grace, you just may earn yourself some respect.
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